how to exude ‘main character energy’
The term “main character energy” came into popular vernacular in the past several months and it instantly resonated with me. While the phrase has inspired at least one hundred thousand hilarious TikToks, there are some serious life lessons to be derived from it. Having main character energy means living as the protagonist in your own life—not a novel concept by any means, but honing in on it can change your entire perspective as it did mine.
having 'main character energy' means showing up as your most authentic self.
Oftentimes I find it hard to live for myself, I’m always hyperaware of the emotions and intentions of the people around me. Sometimes I make decisions based off what will make others happy—this can manifest itself in as simple as the decision of what to get for dinner, to as complex as denying my own emotions to make sure someone else is able to express and experience their own. If this sounds in any way relatable, then I would encourage you to keep reading because I’ve made my own breakthroughs in this arena.
Being a “main character” in your own life means truly prioritizing your own needs as a human. If this feels uncomfortable to hear, it’s because you haven’t been living this way before. Having “main character energy” means showing up as your most authentic self. There is truly nothing more valuable that you can bring to the world than your own perspective, and it took me the longest time to figure this out.
Self confidence is not something anyone is born with, it’s something that we have to actively instill in ourselves and our actions. Society gives us an impossible mold that we have to fit in order to be deemed worthy of love, and that is something we all have to simply reject in order to love ourselves.
Becoming the “main character” in our lives can take a bit of conscious decision making, and that’s why I’m sharing what has helped me exude “main character energy.”
your truth is the only truth that matters
When it comes to perceiving our place in the world, it’s our own truth in which we must rely on. This doesn’t mean that you should never accept any constructive criticism you receive in your lifetime, but it does mean that only you know the unique experiences and conditions that have made you who you are today. Every person that you come in contact with in life is experiencing you through their own perspective, which means that they’ve never known who you were before they met you and won’t know who you are after they’ve exited your orbit. Just acknowledging that should allow you to experience some relief in knowing that no one person can define your existence in the world, that is completely and entirely up to you.
your feelings are valid
Nobody goes through life completely unscathed, even the most privileged of people face some sort of rejection, shame, and criticism. Recognizing painful emotions is so important, and vocalizing them to the people that have hurt you is even more essential. More often than not, people are not actively trying to hurt you, they might have only lost sight of how their actions affect others. As soon as you vocalize your feelings to a friend, family member or coworker, you can begin the healing process and find more constructive ways to communicate in the future. There is truly nothing to be gained by hiding your feelings and emotions from others simply because you’re afraid of how it might make them feel.
embrace what makes you unique
What you might label an “eccentricity” might just be what makes you someone’s favorite person to be around. We have to reframe how we think about our own personalities and bodies because there is truly no single mold that any human can fit. By embracing the qualities that make you unique, you’re giving the world authentic reasons to love you for who you are.
align yourself with an alpha
We are the company we keep and if you surround yourself with toxic people, the fight to become a main character is going to be a lot harder. The times I feel myself shrinking the most are when I’m in the presence of someone who is emotionally manipulative or causes drama when they don’t get their way. Align yourself with natural born leaders, people that are positive, uplift others and value fairness. When you align yourself with the alpha in any given situation (i.e. strike up a conversation with them), you subconsciously signal to everyone else in the room that you’re also a force to be reckoned with.
disarm people with a smile
People are naturally attracted to people who are approachable, and the easiest way to tear down the wall between you and someone else is by disarming them with a smile.
